The Fourth Magical Word - A short story

It was 8 ‘o’ clock in the morning, when Aarav, who needed no more weight loss, jogged on the vacant streets of Norwich. The only thing he wanted to hear while running on a cold day was - silence. But then his mobile rang killing the dead air around him. It was Sunaina. “Hello, Aarav, I…I have had a wonderful life. And… you will always live in my heart, even after it stops beating.”

“Sunaina, why are you sounding so low? Hang on, I will be there at your place soon,” he said and ran home. He grabbed his car keys from his desk, jumped into his silver Vauxhall Astra and drove as fast as he could. The deserted sight of her house sent shivers down his spine. “Hope she is fine,” he wished and prayed.

As he mounted the steps of her house, his heart pounded. He felt the organ was trying to jump out of his body. He gently pushed the ajar door, which failed to squeak adding to the deep silence in her house. “Sunaina, where are you?” he called out in a low voice. His dry throat made it difficult to utter more words. “I am here, Aarav,” whispered Sunaina, lying on the floor, resting her back on the wall. “Are you alright? What have to done to yourself?” he faltered.

He clutched her arms and lifted her up. He carried her, put her into his car and drove to the hospital, as Sunaina mumbled, “I thought I would never see you again Aarav. I am glad you came. Let us not go anywhere now. I want to spend the last minutes of my life with you. In your arms.”

For the next three months Sunaina had never called Aarav. He knew she had recuperated from an over doze of sleeping pills. He feared not hearing from her and hoped it was not the silence before the storm. Being a faculty of Environment at the School of Geography, University of Norwich, Aarav was passionate about Psychogeography. He enjoyed studying the effects of the geographical environment on the emotions and behavior of people. “I wish I could decipher why I can’t rule myself. Why I can’t tell others not to decide my fate,” he often mused.

It was time for him to call his mother, a school teacher, who lived in Bangalore with his dad, a Physics professor. “Amma, what are you doing? I am fine. Don’t worry about me,” he said at a stretch, not giving her much time to speak. He had predicted the questions that would be fired at him. Questions that would be topped up with anxiety and would leave him embarrassed. “Son, what is wrong with Sunaina? Why don’t you want to get married to her? She is slim, tall, fair and from a good family. She is intelligent too. And both of you are working in the same college,” she said. “Amma, I have told you so many times. I don’t think this relationship is working. Marriage will only end turn this into a disaster. I don’t want to ruin her life. It is easier for an unmarried woman to find a groom than for a divorcee,” he asserted in a higher tone. “Aarav, her parents are anxious and have been visiting us often. What do we tell them? Both of you have known each other for 10 years. You decide what to do, and how we should face them,” she said hanging up the phone abruptly.

After an unpleasant conversation with his mother, all Aarav wanted was a cup of hot filter coffee, but for now, cappuccino would do. He sat sipping his coffee at college café and said to himself, “Falling in love is such a wonderful experience. It is often glorified and regarded as the best thing in a person’s life. But what happens when a person falls out of love. And if with time passions and emotions towards your lady love slowly vanishes. And there is a new pair of eyes that you want to keep looking at.” Aarav knew he was a one-woman man. He never enjoyed flirting. But after meeting Asha, he had felt the origin of a new spark.

He recalled how Asha, a child-hood friend whom he had met after 20 years through a community site, had entered his lonely life. The last time he was in India, he had made sure to catch up with her. To his surprise, the tom-boy back in school had transformed into a lovely woman. She no longer sounded like a school bully who often intimidated Aarav as a kid. Being the class monitor, everyone was scared of Asha. Probably this added to the fear, which forced him to hide his feeling towards her. He often adored Asha’s strategy of managing the class when their teacher failed to turn up to work.

Dressed in a salwaar-kameez, Asha brown eyes were darkened with kohl. “I rarely wear Indian attire, but since I went to the temple today, I am wearing a bindi and these clothes,” she said. For Asha, Aarav was a long lost classmate. She had vague memories of him. “All I remember about you is your neatly ironed uniform shorts, which made you look like walking with two balloons. Your inflated chaddis were too good,” she said, as Aarav turned red. “I had a crush on you,” he said, gathering all the courage he had, despite the memories she had about him. “What? I thought you were amongst the geeks, who had no interest in girls. Well, anyways I was more of a boy in school,” she said. Being 28 years old, the only thing on Asha’s mind was to ‘get settled'. Like any Indian girl, Asha was in search of MM (marriage material). After a few break-ups, she knew an arranged marriage was her last resort. And in Aarav, she did find traces of this rare substance. “Are you single?” she asked him sipped her orange juice. Technically, I am,” he said, hoping no more questions would be asked to him on this subject. For Aarav, everything seemed so perfect all of a sudden, despite his complicated life. He did not want to tell Asha about, Sunaina. The couple met often during his brief stay in India.

“These few days I have spent with you will always be cherished,” he told her, as they drove along the lonely ring-road one night. “Can I kiss you?” he asked. She said nothing but smiled and blushed. “Why is he asking me this? He has remained a fool since school. Why can’t he just do what we both want? I guess professors are bound to seek permission before they begin their practical research,” she thought. He gently held her hand and placed it on the car gear, while manoeuvring the steering with the other. Soon he drove to the service road and slowed down the engine. Asha said nothing and lowered down the window to get some fresh breeze. He held her waist and gently drew her towards him. “You smell great,” he said. “Gucci Envy,” she muttered running her fingers around his hair and guiding his lips over her neck. No longer being able to resist her first kiss with him, Asha violently smacked his lips. “I can do this all my life with you,” he said. The moment soon came to an end as Asha’s mobile phone rang. It seemed to be a reminder to awaken the couple from the trance they had fallen into. “Mom is worried. I need to rush home,” she said.

It was the last day of his holiday in India. While, it helped him de-stress, the guilt of not spilling the beans about Sunaina to Asha chocked Aarav’s throat. “Before I go back, I want to tell you something,” he said. Asha was chopping onions in her kitchen. She predicted he was going to propose marriage to her. And cursed him for being unromantic as he was about to spell the wonderful words while she was in an apron. “Go ahead, I am all ears,” she said. “I had a girlfriend in college. But we broke-up as her father did not approve of our relationship.” “So what,” Asha said, calling him a nutty professor in her mind. “Listen to me darling,” he said and continued, “She then got engaged to a guy chosen by her parents. During this span, I came over. She was out of life, my mind and heart. But after a year, she split with her fiancé, for some reason which she claims is me. From then on, for the past six years, we have been just friends.” “Where is she now?” asked Asha as she began fumbling for words. While her mind was selecting of the best words to accept Aarav’s unsaid proposal, another woman was the last character she wanted in her story. And her ship of dreams sank all of a sudden, when he said, “She is my colleague. Sunaina is crazy about me. I don’t know how to get rid of her,” he said, after which he left to Leeds.

Browsing on his laptop at the café, he missed the warm weather in India and more than that the company of Asha. Getting nostalgic about her is the best way to refresh, he thought. But his ‘pie in the sky’ soon crashed on the table, when he heard Sunaina’s voice. “I have been looking for you in the whole college, and you are in this café, daydreaming,” she said in a stern voice. “Oh I just wanted to have something hot, so I came here,” he said looking into his laptop. “It is six months since you have been to India, do you want to come with me? I have booked two tickets for this weekend,” she enquired. Aarav gathered all his courage to deny her offer, “You know I love travelling alone,” he said and looked into her eyes. But Aarav’s audacity nearly vanished into thin air like the mist that gushed out of his mouth along with his words. Her suicidal tendencies that loomed large in her black big eyes forced him to change his mind. “I will inform my parents that I am coming,” he said, and thought this was a blessing in disguise; an opportunity to meet Asha, whom he was missing more and more with each passing day.

After Sunaina left the café, Aarav called Asha to give her the good news. “Hi sweety. How are you? I will be in Bangalore soon,” he said. “Oh, are you coming down? But you just came six months ago. Is the Norwich University paying you to work in India? You are more often seen here than the UK,” she said, eager to know when he was arriving. “Do you want anything from here? Do let me know,” he said politely. “Thank you so much, but you know of late we get everything in Bangalore. There is just one thing I don’t find here and but it is available twice a year,” she said smiling. “Hope what you are wishing for comes true. That is my wish too, more than yours,” he said.

Asha hoped Aarav’s visit to his home country this time would turn their volatile relationship into and espousal. Being a software engineer, she had scores of wedding proposals gushing into her mailbox, but she knew she had fallen in love with the tall geek. She called in sick to work and left to meet her long-distance flame. “I missed you so much all these six months,” he said, hugging her. “Me, too,” said Asha as she blushed. The two decided on luncheon at a Mexican restaurant.

“I am going to meet an astrologer tomorrow,” he said, knowing Asha would discard such acts as superstition. “Guess this escapism. You don’t know what to do. You can’t decide on whom you wan to get married to. You are going to spend the rest of you life with the one you choose, not the astrologer or you parents,” said Asha, as Aarav’s non-ability to take a firm step, annoyed her. “I know Sunaina for so many years. She is a good friend. I can’t ignore her,” he murmured.

The next day, Aarav and his parents went to meet uncle Murthy, who claimed to know the influence of heavenly bodies on human affairs. Clad in a crème dhoti and kurta, Murthy was in his 60s. A retired, professors, he was their family friend too. “I don’t want to check the compatibility of these two horoscopes. When all of you have decided about the wedding, all I have to do is find an auspicious date to get you married to Sunaina. She is nice girl. I know her father too,” he said.

Little did Aarav think his fate would be sealed on that very day. He was going to be married to Sunaina in a week. He had no words to say, while deep inside he wanted to yell at Murthy uncle for speeding up things. And he did not know how to break this news to Asha, with whom he wanted to live forever.

He called Asha on her mobile. Aarav did not have the courage to meet her in person to tell her his kismet was ruled by others and everything between them was shattered. “Asha, I am getting married to Sunaina. I hope you understand. I have lost you,” he said and hanged up unable to stop tears rolling down his cheeks. The next few days flew fast, with Aarav inviting people and making preparations for his wedding reception. And even before he realized, Aarav had tied the nuptial knot. “I am jealous of Sunaina. She is happy and married to the one whom she loves,” he thought as he saw his bride laughing and chatting with his friends and relatives. “I only hope, I had the valour to tell her - I love her not. The fourth magical word - not - would have perhaps changed my life. My destiny is not in my hands,” he said to himself.